Quien es esta nina?

Indy Girl

Ladies Appreciation Week is winding down, but I thought I would post this slightly altered picture of a fellow blogger. It only seems fair since she has posted my feet, my bro's forearm, my Portland pals, and moi on her own blog.

Have wonderful (long) weekend and knock a few back while thinking about how cool our presidents are... well most are super dopefly, but not all can be. Cheers gang!

The Original E-FO

This is where I am supposed to conclude my Ladies Appreciation Week by talking about my mom. Well, I am I frankly too tired to post right now, but will post about her later on today or Saturday. Happy Friday ladies and gentlemen!

Ladies Appreciation Week

I have decided that this week is Ladies Appreciation Week. Yes, I know all 52 weeks of the year we should love you, but this week I'm discussing female related posts. It appears I have written about female dominant issues thus far. Well, why ruin a good thing. Not sure when it occured, but that cupid character struck all the women in my life with arrows. Maybe it's because my mom* has such a profound influence in my life, but I must thank all of you out there in the blogosphere and beyond. Thanks for listening to me when the chips were down. I am thankful to have such an amazing network of friends. You have provided me with very useful insight on tons and tons of things, ideas, and whatever else. Thanks to all.

Yes, I am happily married. How did I know my wife was the right person? Well as some of you may be able to tell, I'm a bit odd and my wife is the first person I dated that completely understood who I was. She just got me. What really won me over was a book of short stories she wrote for me back in 1998 before I embarked on a cross-country road trip to find myself. Before I hit my first patch of interstate I was sobbing like a baby because I had finally met someone that truly understood all that is Egan. I had second thoughts about the timing of my road trip and as hard as it was for my wife, she encouraged me to carry out my solo road trip dream. How did we meet you ask? Believe it or not we met in a now defunct Seattle danceclub appropriately named the Romper Room. We did the long distance thing at first and solidified our relationship with phone conversations that went deep into the night. I could go on and on, but in the interests of not boring too many of you... I will let it be. Too much public gushing could be a turnoff. N-PO you rock!

Men you will get your time, I promise. Future topics for the male reader will include, but are not limited to the following: how to attract the females while at the gym using good flexing poses, proper grooming techniques, hairstyles to drive the ladies crazy, music to play (and not play) in your car with all the windows down, elevator friendly topics with hot women, authors, foreign language practice, and finally why one shouldn't post late at night after drinking a beer with 6.8% alcohol content

P.S. I am a bit tipsy at this late hour. Seriously contemplating tracking down an old actual journal of mine and typing out an entry or two. Not sure that's a wise idea since I know Dr. Phil reads this blog.

*much more on my lovely mother tomorrow Saturday. (serious post alert)

Numbers game

Who's following me? I lost my gym lock so did any of you happen to take it? Yes, I am accusing you! I gave my combo out a couple weeks back so I have a hunch one of you took it when I wasn't looking. Damn you all! I had to leave my belongings along the side of the pool so everyone could see them and decide if my wallet was worth stealing. Sorry, I never ever carry cash on me. I am a mugger's worst nightmare as far as that goes. I blame Quicken for that. So tough to track cash transactions in Quicken so me no likey the cash...

Anyhow... a new lock has been purchased to replace lost, stolen, misplaced, or swallowed one. First contestant to correctly identify all three numbers of my new lock wins a purple iPod sock. The number range is 0-39 and there are three sets of numbers used to open this lock. None of the digits repeat and there's a three guess limit (see complete contest rules below). Sample lock combo could be 27-9-36, but isn't it....or is it?

Hint #1: only one of the three numbers is prime.

Official Rules: only people that read this blog can participate.
Eligibility: only female readers of this page can win.
General: by entering this contest you willing agree to allow me to send you heaps of iCards, emails, or comments the rest of this Valentine's week or any combination of the three. You will also religiously read my blog and be put under the eganitis spell. Only one submission per person and not more than three per household will be permitted.
Terms: must read my blog everyday for the rest of your life or face the wrath of my evil teddy bear Terry. Mess with him and he will fucking erase you!
Prizes: A lovely purple iPod sock and free tutelage on any swimming stroke of your choice, If you aren't a swimmer.. then you're up shit creek without a nose plug or a trainer.
Selection of Winners: one winner will be determined by me when my lock suddenly disappears and I find a voodoo doll of myself in my locker.
Winner Notification: winning contestant will be interviewed and photographed by me for a future post on this awesome blog. That post will therefore be notification to all you losers that you are in fact going to have to buy yourself a purple iPod sock.
Sponsors: Hells if I know. I don't have any or else I wouldn't be the one creating this lame post in the middle of the night. Damn I need an assistant for this kind of stuff.

[insert silly photo caption]

lêcher

My friend blessed me with this alcohol induced photo taken a couple years ago. This is what one does during a 30th birthday party celebration. I was very impressed and I seldom get aroused by him. Minutes later I was seen doing the same thing to that very plate. No one laughed at me though and no pictures recorded my antics.

Should you want to contact this stud muffin, his email address is included here. For faster delivery, post an original comment and he can be yours for three installments of $49.95, IF* you tell a friend.

*no exceptions made and that includes you Murphy.

Happy Valentine's Day ladies!

Well well well, my favorite holiday is here. I know this is a special day for many couples. Many of them will get engaged or married today, go out for dinner with their significant other, or maybe even exchange some tender moments in front of the warm fire while sipping some fine wine.

However, there are a couple flip sides to this equation, those not in relationships and spouses. First of all, why must those single folks feel so bad about these 24 hours? There's absolutely nothing wrong with being single. I want all you single folk, especially the women, that read this blog to understand that your plight is understood. Don't fret if you don't have a date, didn't get a red envelope, didn't eat any Sweethearts, didn't get a peck on the cheek, or didn't get a call from someone you're pining after. It is perfectly fine to be single today and any other time of the year, including New Year's Eve.

Secondly, my real discussion regarding Valentine's Day is who it's geared towards. Is it not geared toward the female much more so than the male? Listen to the radio and/or watch tv and everything is about the woman. The man can buy a woman all sorts of jewelry, but not once did I hear any advertisements soliciting goodies for the man. As expected Victoria's Secret did seem busier than normal yesterday. I know this since I was camped out in front of the store watching patrons come and go with cute pink overstuffed bags. This begs the question, when is Husband's Day? I am admittedly not the most romantic person in the world, but I don't think I am the least romantic person either. My spouse does a good job on Valentine's Day, but how many guys have a disdain or dread for this day because of the huge pressures to "perform"? I personally feel the bar is raised on this day for no apparent reason. Valentine's Day is a 365 day a year holiday. Shouldn't those of us in relationships celebrate this holiday year round by cherishing our spouse each and every day? An "I Love You" is definitely in order so here it is... "I love you Hallmark!

P.S. N-PO, je t'aime!

Late night neighborhood snooping...

Okay.. so I had to peek out the window before going to bed. Noticed way too many high schoolers hanging out on our street, which is a recent phenomenon. Being the curmudgeon I am, decided to investigate since I want to know who to bust or cap if vigilante justice is necessary. I walk down the block and see a bunch scantily clad high schoolers and dudes casually strut into the dumpy rental house on the corner. All had beer bottles or cans in their hands and didn't seem to care about me. At least now I know for sure the cause of the weekend noise. Task complete!

On my way back from my task I notice a seemingly lost dog. This is the same big stocky dog I saw wandering down our street about seven hours earlier. Figured he/she must be lost. Like the swell guy I am I read the dog's tags and realized it was our neighbor's dog. Walked Sadie towards the house and convienently the neighbors had just returned home from visiting friends. Problem solved. Sadie and the Radfords, our neighbors, are now happy! Task complete!

-Inspector Clouseau

Computer Hacking skills

I finally saw The movie, Napolean Dynamite, that everyone has raved about. It was quite good and an editor's note here. I was nothing like Napolean in high school. He at least went on a date, although we both have blonde curly hair and can cut it up on the dancefloor! Bastard makes me look a freakin' idiot.

Okay.. I am hella tired so off to bed I go. Happy Sunday gang!